lymed out

my quest to getting these suckas out!

The Colonoscopy + Gastroscopy. At the same time.

Here is a a non detailed colonoscopy + gastroscopy. If you want more details on the colonoscopy alone, GO HERE as per my previous post.

I have read that the prep is far worse than the procedure itself. I braced myself for the worst possible day ever. My husband, who is so out of the loop on this had no idea what was going on. He  just “knew” I had to prep for a colonoscopy since I have been blabbering about it for a month. I honestly didn’t know what was going on in his brain that day, because he says: “Hey, lets go out and look for a snow blower.”

I’m like “Um. Hello. Do you not know what a colon prep is? It means you drink this crap that makes you live on the toilet all day. Unless you plan on chaining me to a toilet to go look for a snow blower, I think I’m going to stay home. Thanks.”

He said in his defense: “I was only trying to take your mind off food.”

So with that, if you have ended up here on my blog through a colonoscopy search, you will know that you are required to fast that day. You can’t eat anything but jello or drink broth, water, juice and nothing that has red or purple color. This is so that they don’t think there is blood in your colon. Anyways, the day wasn’t bad at all. It was actually quite splendid because the fast made my stomach feel much better. Although I was scared my hypoglycemia symptoms would appear, I was totally ok and was scheduled first thing in the morning at an ungodly hour of 7 am.

Most people will say the worst part is the bathroom part. It wasn’t that bad, more an annoyance than anything else. And once you keep going, you will really need to invest in some high end quality toilet paper. And some cool wipes.

What made matters worse is that some people decided to drop by unannounced. This was not good. I excused myself to our room and hoped to heaven that they didn’t hear the toilet flush a billion times. Seriously though, on top of the added stress, who needs to worry about guests hearing you flush the toilet every 3 min? SERIOUSLY!!!!

Depending on the colon prep you get, mine was really easy and simple. Because we are in Canada, I was able to use Pico-Salax. It’s the best thing. So the night before, you take 2 pills of Dulcolax Stool Softeners. Then the next day you do the fast until 4:00 pm at which time you take the first dose of Pico-Salax. You will start to use the bathroom around 2 hours later. Then you take the next dose at 8:00 pm. And you can say goodbye to the bathroom around midnight. And maybe say a quick hello around 3:00 am. I was very concerned that the early morning 1 hour drive to the clinic would make me regret not renting an RV with a toilet like that post I mentioned. But by then, you are so cleaned out that there’s no way in hell that anything is left inside of you.

So off to the clinic. I did some preliminary paperwork. I went it and talked to the doctor. The only thing I remember was getting on the table after putting a gown on top of my clothes and the nurse says “Just pull your pants down”. I’m like “Huh? just half way?”. She says “Yep.” That felt very funny weird and violating at the same time. But whatever.

Then she says “open your mouth so I can spray some numbing spray in your throat.” (After the colonocopy, they were going to do the gastroscopy.) I read somewhere on the internet that this procedure sometimes is called “Around the World”. Great.

The only thing I remember is that the numbing spray kinda made me feel like I was choking, but then I was out. I woke up with husband beside me in the triage room and me being incoherent. The doctor said I was fine but took some biopsies from my stomach.

4 weeks later, the results came back all positive along with the biopsy. No Barrett’s Esophagus and no ulcer or anything else noticeable. My next post will give details of the aftermath!!!!


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One thought on “The Colonoscopy + Gastroscopy. At the same time.

  1. Georgia M. on said:

    Boy… you have been “around the world” to hell and back….!

Foggy brain or not, I would love to hear from you!

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