lymed out

my quest to getting these suckas out!

Leaving on a jet plane. Possibly.


Last night, my mom took 5 year old to her place for the night and this morning hubby and I went to church (how different it feels to be single). After, we had lunch at over Moxie’s Bar and Grill (something we haven’t done together in eons.) I had a:

Herbed Oven Roasted Chicken
{fraser valley free-run chicken with white wine, lemon & thyme
reduction, herbed goat cheese & crispy sage}

I saw the word “free-run” and just made a leap for that. Who really knows if those chickens were really running carefree in the wind, but anyway better this than anything else.

As we ate, we started talking about work. He owns his own company and this past month of June has really been incredibly busy for him doing about 15-18 hour days for what seemed an eternity. We started talking about vitamins.

Him: Do you know that I haven’t taken my usual round of vitamins and I haven’t gotten sick or felt sick from the amount of hours I had to put in?

Me: Really? hmmmmmm…

Him: I think it has to do with our diet. I think it’s been the food that you started to cook, and that I stopped eating junk

Me: DUH! Now can you imagine if you weren’t doing crazy long hours and actually ate a good breakfast, lunch and dinner? Imagine how you would feel then?

I glanced over at the glass of beer he was chugging. “Now your next challenge is to stop THAT.”

Him: Everything in moderation.

I guess you can’t win them all. We finished our lunch and went into the mall. I went into Lululemon and was always wanting to buy a pair of yoga pants. But at the price of $88, I was a little hesitant. Nope, that can be for medication. So hubby looks at the men’s section and whispers “See these track pants, they are $100.” Then he leaves the store. I scream, “But they are sexy!”

You see, he is the type of shopper that won’t spend more than $5 on a shirt. And that’s why I am sometimes embarrassed for him. This sparked a conversation about a possible vacation.

Now, I am fine with going to Disney and all because we had bought a timeshare last year (had I known about the Lyme and costs, I would have thought twice). Well, we have to use it every year or we would have seriously wasted some cash.

However this conversation wasn’t about seeing Mickey. It will be a trip to Asia and Japan.

Aside from my hubby’s intention to go shopping for gadgets and $2 shirts, this trip was to also see my family who haven’t had a chance to meet my 5 year old. You see, I know the drill. I know the entire gut wrenching experience of the 24-36 flight in economy. The 12 hour time difference and the jetlag. The humidity, the climate change, the smog, the over dense population, the possibility of eating something bad and getting a parasite.

The last time we were there was in 2004. We had a great time. But I wasn’t sick. I can’t imagine right now hauling butt there in my condition. Although to be honest, I don’t think I’m in such a terrible state as not to travel* (see footnote). I just need a controlled environment. Like Disney World. I need a hotel room where I can escape just in case. I need a special diet and I know that with family, it will be 3x a day at restaurants and 8 hour days of shopping. (Seriously did I just complain about that?)

So I start arguing with hubby again trying to validate my point:

Me: You really don’t know my condition. For you to think I can just pick up and hop on a plane half way across the world is ludicrous. I don’t vocalize every minute of my day and every symptom I’m experiencing. If I did, you would probably go deaf.

Him: But this is next year. All I want from you is to stay positive. You cannot live your life with nothing to look forward to or grasp. All I want is for you to make an attempt to consider the possibility.

Me: Like I said, I don’t mind travelling on a 3 hour flight to Florida. I cannot get on a plane to travel 19,000 km. Not only that if we are to only spend 2 weeks there, half the time would be trying to adjust to jetlag, and half the other time would be seeing 1500 family members pretending that all is dandy in my land.

Him: We can go 2 weeks then and then another 2 weeks after.

Me: And we are made out of money? What about the flight. I have to worry about 5 year old’s possible melt down, and the plane food and what if I get sick. It’s not like I can say Hey, please let me off in the middle of the Atlantic (although at that point, I’m pretty sure that might be a good option).

Him: Remember last time how I adjusted to jetlag? I stayed up the entire flight. See, if we take a night flight… blah … blah.. and then the day flight… blah blah. And then by this time… blah blah…. but you see, I can work my body hard, you can’t.

Me: I couldn’t even comprehend what you just said, there were too many numbers involved.

Him: We can set you up in business class where you can sprawl out and be comfortable.

Me: Again, are we made of money? Do you know what it costs in business class to Aisa? You can buy 10,000 shirts. Not only that, I will be in business class, while you guys suffer in economy? Do I look like a selfish monster?

Anyway,  maybe I am too hard on him. I don’t know. I love his support and enthusiasm though. He is so tremendously understanding. He said he would do whatever it takes to make it a comfortable trip for me. And it’s funny he is so wanting to do this because it’s my family, not his. Gotta love him!

Well I got 1 year and 4 months to make my decision. If I don’t go, I know he will go without me and take 5 year old and my mom. He has done so much for me already I just can’t deny him his fun.

However, this year, we will need to use up our timeshare. I have an appointment with my LLMD at the end of September. I just don’t know yet if I should piggy back this appointment with seeing Mickey or not.

* Over the past couple of years, I developed a fear of flying. Last year, I was so immensly scared to get on the 3 hour flight to Florida, I needed prescription Ativan to get me through it. I went on YouTube and even watched people board a flight. I spent a few hours watching this and even got panicky on my computer. Like I was in there. It’s not the thought of taking off. It’s the thought of being confined for that amount of time. I’m a person that needs to sit by the aisle. A person that might need to flee at any moment.

The Ativan worked for me like a charm when I took it. It was a mix of being spaced out to having a light buzz. (and I rarely ever drink because I will fall asleep).

Now as I typed this blog, those feelings of nervousness have not occurred. Normally, talking about flights would be enough of a trigger for me. But surprisingly, the anxious thoughts never even entered my brain. It’s short of miraculous. (another blog post on anxiety I guess is due!)

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2 thoughts on “Leaving on a jet plane. Possibly.

  1. I hear you and I understand you completely. We plan so precisely for every possible thing right now the thought of additional planning, packing, being confined on a plane is something I get. My family is always ready to take me home during the holidays so I can rest as the sensory stuff gets to me and wipes me out fast. If we go to my sister’s home in NH, we stay in a lodge nearby as I need to know that I can get away to rest or just be me and not trying to act like I’m fine (which apparently doesn’t fool them). Your husband is wonderful. My husband said we could go to Bora Bora – we don’t even like the sun – but it looks like a little piece of heaven right now. Now the cost………………

    • I cant even imagine staying with fam. I need my space! Lol. Make that your goal to go to bora bora. That would be heaven.

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